Because He is, was, does. [Glorious Fast - Part VIII]

"Then shall thy light break forth as the morning,

and thine health shall spring forth speedily:

and thy righteousness shall go before thee;

and the glory of the LORD shall [go behind thee]

Then shalt thou call, and the LORD shall answer;

thou shalt cry and He shall say

'Here I am!'

Then shall thy light rise in obscurity

and thy darkness be as the noon day:

And the LORD shall guide thee continually,

and satisfy thy soul in drought.

And thou shalt be like a watered garden

and like a spring of water, whose waters fail not.

And they that shall be of thee shall build the old waste places...

and thou shalt be called

'The repairer of the breach'"

Enough said. 

Light, and strength, and holiness. 

A front runner and a rear guard. 

A new name out of nowhere. 

A confident step. A satisfied soul.

An unfailing spring.

A rebuilder of dreams? 

God's dreams?

How can that even be?

Surely there must be more. 

More than brokenness. More than choosing to go hungry.

More than gut wrenching chain-cutting.

More than mercy with power to undo.

More than banishing fear with love.

More than following Him back to finish off my tormentors.

More than giving away my only slice of bread.

More than opening my arms to hold what's dying,

         to see it raised up, or love it till it's gone.

I mean, that's a lot. But that can't be all.

No, it isn't all. There's one more thing.

To realize that after all this, I'm still nothing, will always be nothing.

And I'm saved, and I get to help save, 

because He is, was, does, all this.

"Is this not the fast that I have chosen?"

Yes. 

And I choose it too.

Love With Your Eyes [Glorious Fast - Part VII]

"...and that thou bring the poor that are [afflicted] to thy house?

When thou seest the naked, that thou cover him, 

and that thou hide not thyself from thine own flesh?"

There are times, many times, when answers are not enough.
When the most eloquently chosen words are still a mockery...

Because what are words when I am dying of leprosy, and you are not?
What are words when I am naked, and you are warmly clothed?
What are words when we could have been siblings, when our fates could have been reversed, but you turn away because you'd rather not see my open sores?

I'll tell you exactly what words are then. Even, at times, the well meaning ones...

Shame. Shame and mockery...

Ok, whatever. So I won't talk.
Oh, but what is silence!?

-  -  -  -  -

Many feel as though they don't have the words anyway.
I'm here to go on record saying that that is no limitation.
You can still "bring," you can still "cover..."

You can still open your arms and wrap them around the neck of a dying, reeking, sick child the Highest, and hold them to your heart, unguarded.
You can look steady and strong into the eyes of the naked and afraid, and prove to them that love can see past their lack.

Oh, and you might get the stench of death all over you.
But you might also release a soul from the grip of shame.

Dirty work? You might call it that. I don't.
You know Jesus touched the leprous skin to make it whole.

Oh, love with your hands, your arms, your eyes...
And if your hands get covered in grime, no matter.

Have you ever, have you ever watched darkened eyes light up?

If You Have a Crumb [Glorious Fast - Part VI]

"...Is it not to deal thy bread to the hungry..."

- - - -

Arms open wide, I try to embrace them all.
Canis Major, Aries, Lepus, Orion, Columba...
All in their undimmed glory against the blackness.
And Venus and Jupiter, brightest of all.

Head tipped back, I spin; take it in.
Try to grip infinity while the earth grips me, twirls me through the universe like a daddy does his child.

And it's just me. Me and my dog.
On a 36 degree morning. At 8,000 feet.

I break into a smile.

And I whisper to myself; to Him--

No sooner has a child of the Highest yielded to transforming grace, than he is made an ambassador among men.*

No sooner!

- - - -

"But I have nothing."

If you have a crumb of bread, you have enough.

It doesn't say you must be a wholesale broker of baked goods.
Nor does it say that those goods must be the finest pastries.
Nor does it say that you'll need a flawless record of lifelong fidelity to be trusted with the job...

Because no sooner has a child of the Highest yielded to transforming grace, than he is made an ambassador among men.

What it does say, is that this bread, this simple fare passed down to sustain life--

It's not just bread you picked up somewhere for general distribution.
This was yours.
Your next meal.

"...Is it not to deal thy bread to the hungry..."

Beautiful is this truth. A terrible beautiful.

If you have a crumb of bread to eat, (and most people do) you have enough to give away.
And if you would see men free, and full, and overflowing,
you must.

- - - -

At hill's top I turn, greet the dawn.
Embrace the empty expanse with my whole heart.
This is fullness.

*See page 2.1 of Mount of Blessings...

Chained by Fear [Glorious Fast - Part IV]

"...and to let the oppressed to free..."

"There is nothing in the world to fear, but fear itself."
--words to a trusted friend those.

Fear substantiates the false claims of every captor.

Because when I fail, this jail I find myself in is horrible...
But even more horrible is the fear.

Fear keeps thousands in prison, when the door is wide open.
Because worse than jail itself is fearing "how God will treat me" when I get out...

But to say that God is anything like fear describes is as wrong as calling the devil a savior.

Nothing could be farther from the truth.

The truth is, God loves.
only. loves.

But the fearing can scarcely be blamed for disbelieving that at times...

We've taught them to.

Yes. You and me.
We teach the weak to fear.
By our actions. When we're supposed to be representing Jesus Himself...

And that keeps them in prison even when the doors are open.


"...and to let the oppressed to free..."

Not just by getting the door open.
By helping them believe they'll always find open arms on the other side of the threshold.

Always.

Trophies of His Mercy [Glorious Fast - Part III]

"...to undo the heavy burdens..."

Undo.
I love that word.

I love that word.

Schoolmaster holds up a bony finger and rants of paradises lost. Of opportunities wasted. Of moments, talents, thrown to the wind. Or worse.
Of the train of mistakes so long it takes an army of engines to pull them.
And that army of engines is me.
(And so, we get nowhere.)

Of the crushing weight of another failure.
Another moment I regret the second it is gone.
Of the shame that no one can understand because they know nothing of its source...

Schoolmaster's voice shrieks this madness,
this madness that is real,
and I cover. cower. cry.

And then in the midst of this shower of burning brimstone a hand is raised.
And teacher's tirade ceases on a goldfish-gulp of air, for sheer shock that someone might want to speak...
And the voice is quiet, but it is as solid as a rock.

"Is there no way to undo?"

"Un-DO?!"

-  -  -  -  -

Grace.
I love that word too...

And it does undo.
The Hebrew word means more than just to untie one's shoelaces.

It means to utterly confound, baffle, unravel...

I know.
I know, in the present-progressive.
Because I pace too, lion-like. Fists doubled up. Star-studded blackness outside french doors to bookshelf, and back.
And I dry my eyes, drop exhausted. Only to cry some more.
And I whisper--

"He restoreth my soul... He restoreth my soul..."

I have heard it said that "There is more mercy in Christ than sin in us."*

I believe it.
Yes, there is a way to undo.

Oh, but schoolmaster shrieks again that the scars will always remain.

Yes. And even scars are trophies of His mercy--
A scar is infinitely better than an eternally open wound.

Thank you Jesus.

-  -  -  -  -

And so the soldier gets up from his face forgiven. Again.
Pure. again.

But only as he remembers what he himself has learned on his face will he be qualified to help undo burdens himself.

This is why we must never forget...

Be thou merciful. 

*Richard Sibbes

Chosen Hunger [Glorious Fast - Part I]

"Is not this the fast that I have chosen?"

I know what it is to be hungry.

A little bit.

You know, where every sensation is heightened, (stub your toe and see.) and you carry with you an ache that won't. go. away...

Hunger is both a gift, and a tragedy.

And normally, we go to great lengths to avoid it...

But to choose to be hungry... 

We call that fasting. 

To choose to carry the ache everywhere--

To embrace the heightened sensitivity to seemingly unrelated woe,

Could this be what it means to have fellowship with Christ in His sufferings?

And could it be that personal vulnerability, and brokenness, and weakness born of raw hunger are prerequisite to being a channel for life and liberty?

Could it be?

Aim Higher

Seems like these days, to be a "Christian" is to try resist temptation (most of the time),

to try to figure out how to be the same while being different,

and to make pilgrimage plans based on the weather report.

I've had enough of that.

So I aim to reclaim the name Christian. 

To reclaim a life of perpetual resistance, and perfect obedience.

To realize that to make a mark one must be different... 

And instead of waiting for fair weather, to run into darkness. 

Because that's where shining makes a difference.

And because that's what Christians do.

"Behold, a king shall reign in righteousness, and princes shall rule in judgment. 

And a man shall be as an hiding place from the wind and a covert from the tempest; as rivers of water in a dry place, as the shadow of a great rock in a weary land..." (Is 32:1,2 Emphasis added)

Above the timber line: looking down from Arizona's tallest peak.

None Stronger.

Isaiah 47-52

Gone for 5 days, home for fleeting moments, gone for 12 days. 

We’ll see if I have internet this time...

I have a lot to be thankful for. The last 5 days were spent in the Gila wilderness with my family, 10 miles beyond nowhere. I’ll upload more photos sometime... 

Every moment was loaded... But especially memorable were the silent times accented by Isaiah, and Christ’s Object Lessons. If I didn’t have to get some sleep before rolling out of here for my early flight tomorrow, I’d write more... But I just have time for one of my very favorite lines-- 

“The Lord hath made bare His holy arm...”

As if to prove to all the world that there is none stronger. 

Like, none. End of discussion.

  

Another little secret

Isaiah 45-46
Before the guy even knew God's name, he had a promise. God was to anoint him, and then go before him knocking down stone walls, breaking iron gates, and setting the kings of the earth on their faces... And this guy was a heathen!
He had a little secret though... God had his right hand, and he had God's. (45:1)
How much more shall we have power over our enemies when we choose above all to place and leave our hand in God's... (46:3-4)
Oh, why do we ever do otherwise?

Ashes

Isaiah 44

Yes, they're what we're made of. But our sights should be so much higher...

Instead, amongst the ashes of our human solutions come to naught we still search for direction, seemingly unconscious of the light above and before us. Like the poor man of Isaiah 44:46, we chop down a tree, start a little fire, cook a bit of lunch, and say: "Aha, I am warm..." Yes, for just this one moment... 

Don't get me wrong, we must turn to ashes... But then what?

When it was all over he scraped up the residue and made a god. We make plans, set standards, and formulate our norms... And then we wonder why we're still not satisfied. 

How can we be?

Oh Jesus, teach us to look only to You... 

Providence at it's best...

Isaiah 41
I love that word-- Providence.
It's ultimate power giving of itself... And that, provision more than sufficient.
There is no promise that we will never lack... Indeed, if we never lacked, there would be no need for a promise. No need for Power. No need for Grace...
We will lack. We must thirst...
But we need remain thirsty only for a moment. Just long enough to recognize our need... And then, Providence kicks in.
And not with a little glass of water either...
"When the poor and needy seek water, and there is none, and their tongue faileth for thirst, I the Lord will hear them, I the God of Israel will not forsake them. I will open rivers in high places, and fountains in the midst of the valleys: I will make the wilderness a pool of water, and the dry land springs of water."
(Isaiah 41:17-18)
Where there is thirst, He creates a river...

Bigger Dreams

Isaiah 35-38

I wonder if you ever stuffed your pockets with acorns as a child. My guess is, you did. 

I have fond memories of scrambling around under the old oak trees in the park, searching and hoarding the biggest and best ones until my pockets bulged... Or more recently, sitting serenely under a grove of

oaks one stunning Sabbath afternoon in Germany while a half dozen young German and Austrian friends did the scrambling for me, enthusiastically delivering a pile of acorns to my lap... 

I don’t know, there’s just something about it. 

And maybe when you too had your pockets full of perfect ones, your mother saw you hobbling towards the car and asked “What are you going to do with those?” 

“Oh, I don’t know... something special. I’m-- I’m going to make something...”

If you were anything like me, you had no idea what you were going to make. It probably ended up being an absurd construction paper/acorn collage that rivaled modern art for abstraction, but which your mother still treasures to this day. 

Whatever the case, you had dreams for those acorns...

Hezekiah had dreams too... Dreams for his life, and for his reign that sickness suddenly threatened. All at once we find the king weeping pitifully, longing for a little more time... And who wouldn’t? 

And then we hear God in His eternal pity give him a promise, fully knowing what it would cost future generations...

God will lay aside His dreams, if we insist on ours. 

His dream for every acorn is much bigger than an absurd collage. And don’t get me wrong, there’s beauty in that childish art. It just doesn’t remotely approximate to the glory of the oak tree... 

Our problem is that instead of letting our own dreams go in favor of His, we pursue His glory the best way we know how-- stuffing our pockets with the best in the hopes that we can make something worthy of them. 

But dreams must die, before they can grow. 

The acorn must die... First, it must be deemed unfit by even the hungriest of squirrels, then it must be forgotten... Often it gets buried deep beneath layers of rubbish, seemingly lost in a tangle of old leaves and dirt, much like our tangled and mangled hopes and dreams. It must give itself up. Totally. Permanently. 

Then it grows. 

_______________

God has a thousand other dreams too... Like turning enemies into dead men (Isa. 37:36) and and turning deserts into rose gardens. (Isa. 35:1)

What He needs is children that will cling more tenaciously to their Father’s dreams than to their own. Children that are willing to surrender to Him not just that in them which is evil, but more painfully that which is rightfully theirs, and perfectly good, if He asks for it. 

Anything less will be less than His best...    

A New Slogan

For the word of God is quick, and powerful, and sharper than any twoedged sword... (Heb 4:12)

So shall my word be that goeth forth out of my mouth: it shall not return unto me void, but it shall accomplish that which I please, and it shall prosper in the thing whereto I sent it. (Isa 55:11) 

It occurs to me that there is only one step between perfect safety and total destruction. There is a line in the sand upon which the "sword bathed in heaven" (Isa 34:5) will fall... Those to one side will be safe, those to the other will be destroyed by their own sins. And those with one foot on either side? Well... They will be the first to feel it.

But those on the right... Tis the truth that has made them free! Tis the very sword that falls in judgment and brings so much destruction, that has cut their chains. I think I'm picking up a pattern here...

I think we need to shift an old slogan into a new strain and make it our own... Something like:

The Word of God--

Live by it.

Nothing Compares...

Isaiah 31

It’s nice to know our Master stands head and shoulders taller than all of His rivals. (Isaiah 31:3) No other empire compares... 

But perhaps more phenomenal is the fact that our Master’s servants can also stand head and shoulders above their rivals. Because no power compares to that at their disposal. 

And yet, the kingdom of Heaven is likened to a mustard seed. Seems like a humble beginning for the greatest of herbs...

There’s a little lesson there... 

Think about it.  

Beautiful...

Isaiah 27

It is the epicenter of His pleasure and delight-- His vineyard. The place where His fruit grows...

And keeping it safe and beautiful at every moment is His top priority. But here he doesn't use guards and towers to keep it from harm. He uses a constant supply of water...

Because that which is spirit-saturated is indestructible. 

Terrible, or Glorious?

Isaiah 24

It all depends. 

It is called a “terrible day” for a very good reason. But just wait for the dust to settle... The earth may be reeling and shaking, but a few hearts are yet firm. For them, this day is glorious... 

They have no cause for fear. After all, the Power that splits the earth in two around them (v.19) and burns the very firmament is no stranger to them... It’s the same power that keeps them from falling.

And the Light that blinds and burns everything that is unholy and untrue, (even now, under their feet) is no stranger either. It’s the very same light that has illuminated the path of the just since... forever.

Yes, it is only the strangers that fear. The firm hearts are ready to rejoice in the purity of Heaven, because Heaven in all it’s purity is in their hearts. 

Sweet Jesus-- Would the song of my life be in harmony with Heaven’s anthem if I were there today? 

Or would I be a discordant note?   

“Tune my heart to sing Your praise...”

Dishonor

Isaiah 23

You can find it on the list of things He hates. In fact, He calls it an abomination. And he’s promised to bring it low (Job 40:12), and cut it off (Ps. 12:3). He’s also promised rebuke & curses (Ps. 119:21), shame (Ps 119:78), judgement (Isaiah 2:12)...

...and now, dishonor. (Isaiah 23:9)

I think you’ll agree we would best be rid of it.

“for God resisteth the proud, and giveth grace to the humble.”

Human Solutions...

Isaiah 20

This life is full of mountains to climb... Mountains which are supposed to make you braver, taller, stronger.

Now the path of the Just goes straight up and over. And if you climb that way very long you will certainly encounter other pilgrims with bleeding feet and throbbing hearts... But they are making progress.

Alternatively, you can follow the nicely laminated road map published by your enemies... Or sell your liberty for a gondola or subway ticket.

But before you do that, read Isaiah 20.
I read it this morning, and found out that the best of human solutions always come to the same end--

Uttermost Shame

Too many gods...

Until His opinion is all that matters, we’re in danger of self-destruction...

Read Isaiah 19. God didn’t have to do anything! He just showed up on the scene riding a chariot of clouds, and things started happening. Most notably, the multitudinous idols started rattling off of their foundations. 

The next verse says it all... (v.2) With their gods losing their footing, the men start losing their minds. Now they’re literally at each other’s throats, no more decency, no more familyness, no more patriotism.

When gods move, men move. 

That’s not so scary for a professing follower of Christ, like myself, until I remember little things like my opinion. I need not even make a case for how easy it is to idolize it... (Especially when it is right!) Just let somebody rattle it to it’s foundation and see what happens. Oh, and I can be totally civil, and pleasant throughout without much effort... But inside...later...

I fear even serious Christians act like desperate Egyptians sometimes...

But there is in this story a beautiful Ray of Glory... And a simple lesson for those who want to live an unrattled life...

Choose one God. And choose One that can’t be rattled...

I’ll say it again. 

Until His opinion is all that matters, we’re in danger of self-destruction...

Nevertheless!

Isaiah 14/15

I have been silent, but not still... Yesterday was the climax of the Texico Conference Campmeeting, and my viola was out of its case more than in it, precluding a post.

And then, there were other reasons too... 

I’m the kind of guy that expends a great deal of energy on invisible conquest. In fact, most of the people I fight for don’t even know it. (Maybe never will). But that’s ok...  

Anyway, all day, and all this morning, verse 1 of chapter 14 kept tapping at my consciousness, waiting for quiet... And finally, I got it.

_______________________

“For the Lord will have mercy on Jacob, and will yet choose Israel...”

Even though they had stumbled and fallen. Even though He had picked them up and brushed the dirt off of them countless times before. Even though their mistakes were not always innocent ones... Still...

Still.

I cannot tell you what that means to me. Even though He’s picked me up out of the dirt ten thousand times, yet He has mercy. Yet He chooses me. Does that even make sense?

It reminds me of my favorite word. “Nevertheless.”

Actually, it’s the reason behind my favorite word. Because His unwavering commitment to my salvation (nevertheless) calls forth the best I can give in return... 

If His “faith” in me is strong enough to make Him pick me up again when I fall, risking His name over and over again by claiming me as His child, then I am worse than a fool not to honor Him with my trust in return. 

And so, am I a man committed. 

And though I admit that for the Christian in this world, pain and hardship, toil, sacrifice, grief and loss and suffering are very real, very often... (here comes that word--)  

Nevertheless!!!